Almost every planning meeting I have with clients will include some mention of a loved one who is deceased. But how much should deceased relatives be honoured on a naming or wedding day?
The answer is of course that it is completely up to you. Some clients don't feel comfortable with a big mention whilst some don't know that they can include them!
So here are some ways of honouring a deceased loved one as part of your special day. Hopefully you will find something you are comfortable with.
Give them a mention
Have your celebrant briefly mention absent loved ones (this can include those absent as well as deceased).
Have your celebrant mention the deceased loved one(s) by name.
Mention them in speeches or have a toast.
Include a moment of reflection.
Include a note in your order of service.
Include an item belonging to the deceased
Perhaps you have a brooch, watch, tie, scarf you can wear?
You can attach items to a bouquet.
You can display items on a table if you feel they will be safe.
You might want to include an item in the ceremony itself - a parents' ring in the ring exchange or a child's scarf in a handtie for example.
A spare seat
Decorate a seat on the front row of your guests
Decorate a seat and make a place setting on your top table
Attach one to a bouquet
Display one on a chair or table
Create a memory tree - at my wedding we had a photo holder "tree" that included photos of all my grandparents and my brother in law. This was accompanied with tags for people to write wishes and messages of love as a guestbook alternative.
A simple candle can be lit in a person's memory and displayed throughout the ceremony or the day.
Memorial candles with text or a photo can be a nice personal touch.
Have your guests all light a candle each.
You can include some of their favourite things such as
Scents or perfume.
Food and drink including family recipes, sweets or chocolate.
Charity - donations on their behalf.
I hope that has sparked your imagination and given you some ideas. Remember, it is whatever you feel comfortable with. I will be adding more photos to my Pinterest board "Some Different Traditions" so do take a look for inspiration.